Introduction
Understanding high-scoring IELTS writing examples can dramatically boost your IELTS writing test skills and scores. This guide offers a comprehensive approach to analyzing model essays, enhancing your ability to craft high-scoring responses.
Learning from exemplary IELTS writing task 2 examples is one of the most efficient ways to improve your own IELTS writing practice test performance. By deconstructing successful IELTS essay examples, you’ll discover patterns and techniques that can be applied to your own IELTS writing exam, regardless of the topic you encounter on test day.
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Complete Model Essay Analysis
Before diving into specific techniques, let’s analyze a complete IELTS writing task 2 example with our IELTS writing checker methodology. This will provide a practical foundation for understanding the concepts we’ll discuss throughout this guide.
The Model Essay
PROMPT Essay Question
The only reason for people working hard is to earn money. To what extent do you agree or disagree?
MODEL Sample Answer
In contemporary society, it is often argued that the primary motivation for people to work hard is to earn money. While financial incentives undeniably play a significant role, I believe that there are other compelling reasons that drive individuals to put in substantial effort in their professional lives.
Firstly, personal fulfillment and job satisfaction are crucial factors. Many people derive a sense of accomplishment and pride from their work. For instance, professionals such as doctors, teachers, and artists often pursue their careers out of passion and a desire to make a meaningful impact. The intrinsic rewards of helping others, creating something unique, or achieving personal goals can be powerful motivators that go beyond mere financial gain.
Secondly, career advancement and professional growth are important considerations. Ambitious individuals often work hard to climb the corporate ladder, gain recognition, and achieve higher status within their fields. The pursuit of promotions, awards, and professional development opportunities can drive people to excel in their roles, even if the immediate financial benefits are not substantial.
Moreover, social and familial responsibilities can also influence work ethic. Many individuals strive to set a positive example for their children, support their families, or contribute to their communities. The desire to be a role model or to provide a better future for loved ones can inspire people to work diligently.
In conclusion, while earning money is undoubtedly a significant motivator for hard work, it is not the sole reason. Personal fulfillment, career advancement, and social responsibilities also play vital roles in driving individuals to excel in their professional endeavors. Therefore, it is essential to recognize the multifaceted nature of motivation in the workplace.
Expert Analysis
Essay Overview:
- Question Type: Opinion Essay (To what extent do you agree or disagree)
- Writing Approach: The essay takes a clear stance by disagreeing that money is the only reason people work hard. It provides multiple reasons supporting other motivations.
- Band Score Estimate: 8-9 (demonstrates all criteria for a high score)
Paragraph Structure Analysis:
- Introduction: Introduces the topic by acknowledging money as a significant motivator but states that there are other important reasons why people work hard.
- Body Paragraph 1: Discusses personal fulfillment and job satisfaction as key motivators. Uses examples like doctors, teachers, and artists who work out of passion.
- Body Paragraph 2: Covers career advancement and professional growth. Explains that people strive for promotions, recognition, and higher status.
- Body Paragraph 3: Explores social and familial responsibilities. Highlights how individuals work hard to support their families and set examples.
- Conclusion: Summarizes the main points by reiterating that while money is important, other factors also motivate people to work hard.
Throughout this guide, we’ll refer back to this model essay to illustrate key concepts in IELTS writing analysis.
Importance of Model Essays
Why Model Essays Matter
IELTS writing examples are crucial in IELTS online coaching, offering insights into high-scoring responses on the IELTS writing test. They illustrate essential elements like structure, collocations for IELTS, and coherence that IELTS writing practice tests help develop.
When you study IELTS writing band 9 examples like our sample about work motivations, you’re essentially accessing expert IELTS training and successful IELTS writing practice. These essays demonstrate practical applications of the theoretical advice you’ll find in preparation materials, showing you exactly what works in real exam conditions.
Benefits of Studying Model Essays:
- Provides concrete examples of abstract writing concepts
- Helps identify patterns in high-scoring responses
- Demonstrates effective applications of vocabulary and grammar
- Shows how to address different question types appropriately
- Illustrates the level of writing expected at different band scores
For more guidance on understanding examiner expectations, refer to our guide on Understanding Band Descriptors and Scoring.
Key Features of Success
Successful essays share features such as a clear structure, diverse vocabulary, and coherent arguments. Examining these can help you achieve a high band score.
Looking at our model essay about work motivations, we can identify these key elements:
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Strong Task Response - The essay directly addresses the question about whether money is the only motivation for hard work, taking a clear position (partial disagreement) and developing it fully.
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Logical Organization - Ideas flow naturally from introduction through three distinct arguments (personal fulfillment, career advancement, social responsibilities) to a balanced conclusion.
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Cohesive Devices - Notice transitions like “Firstly,” “Secondly,” “Moreover,” and “In conclusion” that guide the reader through the argument.
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Lexical Precision - The essay uses precise terms like “financial incentives,” “intrinsic rewards,” and “multifaceted nature of motivation” rather than simpler alternatives.
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Grammatical Sophistication - Varied structures like “While financial incentives undeniably play…” and “The desire to be a role model… can inspire…” demonstrate grammatical range.
Each of these elements contributes to the overall impression your essay makes on the examiner. Understanding how they work together in model essays helps you incorporate similar techniques in your own writing.
Using Model Essays to Improve
Engage with model essays beyond reading. Rewrite sections to apply insights, enhancing your writing skills over time.
đĄ Active Learning Techniques
Try these strategies when working with model essays:
- Highlight and categorize different elements (topic sentences, examples, conclusions)
- Rewrite paragraphs in your own words while maintaining the structure
- Compare multiple essays on similar topics to identify different approaches
- Create templates based on effective sentence structures and transitions
- Extract useful vocabulary and create personal word banks organized by topic
For example, with our model essay about work motivations, you could:
- Identify the pattern of claim-example-explanation in each body paragraph
- Extract vocabulary related to workplace motivation for future use
- Study how the writer acknowledges the opposing view (money as motivation) while presenting their own perspective
Breaking Down Essay Structure
Analyzing Introductions
A strong introduction sets the tone. Key elements include a clear thesis and engaging opening. Crafting compelling statements can capture the examiner’s attention.
Let’s examine the introduction from our model essay:
Model Introduction Analysis:
"In contemporary society, it is often argued that the primary motivation for people to work hard is to earn money. While financial incentives undeniably play a significant role, I believe that there are other compelling reasons that drive individuals to put in substantial effort in their professional lives."
Analysis:
- Opens with a general statement acknowledging the common belief
- Uses a concessive clause ("While...") to acknowledge the importance of money
- Clearly states the writer's position (partial disagreement)
- Sets up the structure for the rest of the essay (multiple other motivations)
This introduction is effective because it:
- Demonstrates understanding of the question
- Establishes a clear position
- Uses sophisticated language (“undeniably,” “compelling reasons”)
- Avoids formulaic or memorized phrases
- Sets expectations for what will follow
Understanding how to craft effective introductions is critical for making a strong first impression. Learn more in our guide on Effective Essay Planning Techniques.
Developing Body Paragraphs
Logical flow and coherence are vital in body paragraphs. Support arguments with evidence to maintain consistency throughout the essay.
Let’s analyze a body paragraph from our model essay:
Body Paragraph Structure Analysis:
"Firstly, personal fulfillment and job satisfaction are crucial factors. Many people derive a sense of accomplishment and pride from their work. For instance, professionals such as doctors, teachers, and artists often pursue their careers out of passion and a desire to make a meaningful impact. The intrinsic rewards of helping others, creating something unique, or achieving personal goals can be powerful motivators that go beyond mere financial gain."
Structure breakdown:
- Topic sentence introduces the main idea (personal fulfillment)
- Explanation elaborates on how people feel accomplishment from work
- Specific examples (doctors, teachers, artists) provide concrete support
- Analysis explains why these intrinsic rewards motivate people beyond money
Notice how each component builds logically on the previous one, developing a complete argument. The paragraph stays focused on a single main idea (personal fulfillment as motivation) while providing sufficient development through explanation and examples.
All three body paragraphs in our model essay follow similar structures but address different motivations, creating a balanced and comprehensive response to the prompt.
Learn how to maintain logical flow in your essays with our resource on Writing Coherent and Cohesive Essays.
Strong Conclusion Crafting
An effective conclusion summarizes key points and reinforces your thesis, leaving a lasting impression and ensuring essay cohesion.
Let’s examine our model essay’s conclusion:
Conclusion Analysis:
"In conclusion, while earning money is undoubtedly a significant motivator for hard work, it is not the sole reason. Personal fulfillment, career advancement, and social responsibilities also play vital roles in driving individuals to excel in their professional endeavors. Therefore, it is essential to recognize the multifaceted nature of motivation in the workplace."
Elements:
- Restates position (money isn't the only motivator) using different phrasing
- Summarizes the three main arguments presented in body paragraphs
- Extends to broader implications ("essential to recognize the multifaceted nature")
- Uses sophisticated vocabulary and phrasing ("multifaceted," "excel in their professional endeavors")
â ī¸ Warning
Study how model essays create conclusions that feel both satisfying and complete without simply repeating previous content.
Language and Vocabulary
Lexical Resource Analysis
Varied vocabulary and collocations for IELTS are vital. Identify effective use of synonyms and advanced vocabulary in IELTS writing examples to enhance your lexical range for the IELTS writing test.
Our IELTS writing task 2 example demonstrates excellent lexical resource that our IELTS essay checker can help you develop. Let’s examine some vocabulary choices:
| Category | Examples from Model Essay |
|---|---|
| Words describing motivation | Primary motivation, financial incentives, compelling reasons, drive individuals, intrinsic rewards, powerful motivators |
| Academic collocations | Derive a sense of accomplishment, pursue their careers, make a meaningful impact, climb the corporate ladder |
| Sophisticated connectors | While, firstly, secondly, moreover, therefore, in conclusion |
| Precise descriptors | Substantial effort, crucial factors, ambitious individuals, immediate financial benefits, multifaceted nature |
Notice how the essay avoids repetition by using a range of vocabulary related to the topic of work and motivation. The writer also uses precise terms rather than general ones, demonstrating depth of vocabulary.
For more help expanding your vocabulary, see our guide on Using Advanced Vocabulary in IELTS Essays.
Grammatical Range and Accuracy
Model essays use diverse grammatical structures. Focus on sentence complexity and accuracy to meet high standards.
Our model essay demonstrates sophisticated grammar usage. Let’s examine some examples:
Grammar Variety Examples from Our Model Essay
Complex sentence with concession:
"While financial incentives undeniably play a significant role, I believe that there are other compelling reasons..."
Complex sentence with relative clause:
"Many individuals strive to set a positive example for their children, support their families, or contribute to their communities."
Use of modals:
"The intrinsic rewards of helping others, creating something unique, or achieving personal goals can be powerful motivators..."
Parallel structures:
"Personal fulfillment, career advancement, and social responsibilities also play vital roles..."
These varied structures demonstrate the writer’s grammatical range without sacrificing clarity or accuracy. The complexity serves the communication purpose rather than being used artificially to impress.
Tone and Style Adaptation
Adapting to the appropriate formal tone is crucial. Ensure your style suits different essay types, maintaining engagement.
Our model essay demonstrates an appropriate academic tone for an IELTS Task 2 essay:
- Formal but not overly complex: Uses academic language without unnecessary jargon
- Objective yet personal: Balances objective analysis (“Many people derive a sense of accomplishment”) with personal position (“I believe that there are other compelling reasons”)
- Measured language: Uses hedging where appropriate (“often pursue,” “can be powerful motivators”)
- Avoids extremes: Acknowledges the importance of money while arguing for other factors
Notice how the essay maintains a professional, thoughtful tone throughout without becoming too conversational or too artificially academic.
Different question types may require subtle shifts in tone. For example, problem/solution essays often use more directive language than advantage/disadvantage essays, which tend to be more evaluative.
Avoiding Common Mistakes
Interpreting Essay Prompts
Accurate interpretation of essay questions is vital. Avoid misunderstandings by practicing strategies to grasp prompts accurately.
Our model essay demonstrates excellent prompt interpretation:
Prompt Analysis:
Original prompt: "The only reason for people working hard is to earn money. To what extent do you agree or disagree?"
Key elements identified:
- The absolute claim "only reason" (suggests considering other reasons)
- The focus on "working hard" (not just working, but putting in extra effort)
- The relationship between work effort and monetary motivation
- "To what extent" asking for a nuanced opinion (not just agree/disagree)
How the essay addresses it: The writer clearly identifies that the prompt contains an absolute claim ("only reason") and appropriately challenges it by providing multiple alternative motivations while still acknowledging money's importance.
When analyzing model essays, notice how the writers correctly identify all parts of the question and maintain relevance throughout their response.
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Learn more about correctly addressing prompts in our guide on Improving Task Response and Addressing the Prompt.
Balancing Complexity
Achieve balance in writing. Ensure essays are neither too simple nor overly complex, maintaining clarity and sophistication.
Our model essay strikes an excellent balance:
- Complex ideas expressed clearly: Discusses abstract concepts like personal fulfillment and social responsibility in accessible language
- Varied sentence structures: Mixes shorter sentences with longer, more complex ones
- Sophisticated vocabulary used naturally: Terms like “multifaceted” and “intrinsic rewards” enhance precision without feeling forced
- Concrete examples supporting abstract points: References to doctors, teachers, and artists make theoretical concepts tangible
Notice how the essay avoids both extremes: it’s neither filled with simplistic sentences and basic vocabulary, nor packed with unnecessarily complex structures and obscure terminology.
For guidance on finding this crucial balance, refer to our resource on Common Mistakes to Avoid in IELTS Writing Task 2.
Cohesion and Coherence
Maintain essay coherence using cohesive devices for smooth transitions, ensuring logical argument flow.
Our model essay demonstrates excellent cohesion and coherence:
Cohesion Techniques in Our Model Essay:
1. Clear progression signposts:
- "Firstly, personal fulfillment..."
- "Secondly, career advancement..."
- "Moreover, social and familial responsibilities..."
2. Thematic unity: Each paragraph focuses on a different non-financial motivation for working hard, creating a unified argument structure.
3. Consistent referencing: Terms like "these" and "their" correctly refer to previously mentioned concepts and people.
4. Logical relationships: Uses conjunctions like "while" to show concession and "therefore" to show consequence.
Study how our model essay creates a clear logical path from introduction through body paragraphs to conclusion, with each part connected to the others through both explicit transitions and implicit logical relationships.
For more guidance on creating cohesive essays, check our detailed guide on Linking Words and Phrases for IELTS Writing.
Practical Application Techniques
Step-by-Step Analysis Process
Follow this systematic IELTS training approach when analyzing IELTS writing examples:
- First reading: Get a general understanding of the essay’s argument and structure
- Question analysis: Identify how the essay addresses all parts of the prompt
- Structural breakdown: Mark the introduction, body paragraphs, and conclusion
- Paragraph analysis: Examine how each paragraph is constructed and developed
- Language study: Highlight effective vocabulary and grammatical structures
- Transition review: Note how ideas connect within and between paragraphs
- Critical evaluation: Assess strengths and areas that could be improved
Let’s apply this process to part of our model essay:
Analysis Example:
Body paragraph: "Secondly, career advancement and professional growth are important considerations. Ambitious individuals often work hard to climb the corporate ladder, gain recognition, and achieve higher status within their fields. The pursuit of promotions, awards, and professional development opportunities can drive people to excel in their roles, even if the immediate financial benefits are not substantial."
1. Structure: Topic sentence â explanation â examples â elaboration
2. Key vocabulary: Career advancement, professional growth, ambitious, corporate ladder, recognition, excel
3. Grammar features: Parallel structures ("climb..., gain..., and achieve..."), present simple for general truths
4. Coherence: "Secondly" connects to previous paragraph, stays focused on one main idea (career goals)
5. Development: Starts with abstract concept (career advancement), then provides concrete examples (promotions, awards)
This methodical approach ensures you extract maximum value from each model essay you study.
Creating Your Own Essay Bank
Build a personal collection of analyzed IELTS writing task 2 examples with IELTS AI feedback:
- Categorize by question type: Keep separate sections for opinion, advantage/disadvantage, problem/solution, and discussion essays
- Highlight effective language: Mark useful phrases, transitions, and vocabulary
- Create summary sheets: Note effective structures and techniques from each essay
- Track common topics: Group essays addressing similar themes (environment, education, technology, etc.)
For our IELTS writing practice on work motivation, you might extract:
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Useful phrases for opinion essays: “While X undeniably plays a significant role,” “I believe that there are other compelling reasons,” “Therefore, it is essential to recognize…”
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Topic-specific vocabulary: Related to work motivation, career development, and professional satisfaction
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Effective paragraph structures: The pattern of topic sentence â explanation â examples â analysis
Your personalized essay bank becomes a valuable reference during your IELTS preparation.
Applying Insights to Practice
The most effective way to benefit from model essay analysis is through deliberate practice:
đĄ Practice Strategy
- Analyze a model essay on a specific topic
- Identify key techniques and effective structures
- Find a similar practice question
- Plan your response, incorporating insights from the model
- Write your essay under timed conditions
- Compare your approach with the original model
- Reflect on differences and similarities
For example, after analyzing our model essay about work motivations, you might practice with a similar question:
“Some people believe that success in life comes from taking risks and trying new things. Others believe that success comes from careful planning. Discuss both views and give your opinion.”
You could apply the same balanced approach, clear structure, and sophisticated language patterns while adapting to this new topic.
For structured practice opportunities, explore our collection of Practice Task 2 Questions and Answers.
Conclusion
Analyzing IELTS writing examples through IELTS online coaching is crucial for improving IELTS writing test skills. Regular IELTS writing practice tests with diverse topics and IELTS essay checker feedback will make you adept at crafting high-scoring IELTS exam responses.
The insights gained from studying successful essays like our example about work motivations provide concrete examples of abstract writing principles. By systematically deconstructing these models and applying what you learn to your own writing, you’ll develop the skills needed to address any Task 2 prompt effectively.
Remember that the goal of IELTS training online is not to memorize IELTS writing examples but to understand the principles that make them successful on the IELTS writing test. With consistent IELTS writing practice and application of IELTS AI feedback, these principles will become second nature in your own IELTS writing exam performance.
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This article is part of our comprehensive guide: Mastering IELTS Writing Task 2: Strategies for Success